|
|
PROFITABLE MUSICIAN:
FEM FRIDAY EDITION
|
|
|
Happy FEM Music Friday!
There is a question that can sting when you have not performed in a while.
“Are you still doing music?”
The person asking may not mean anything by it. They probably just remember that you used to sing, write, perform, lead worship, record, or talk about music all the time. They might just be making what they think is harmless small talk.
Still, that question can hit an already raw nerve.
You may have stepped away for reasons that are totally legit and completely necessary. Your job needed your focus or your family needed your attention.
Your days were full of meal prep, school pickups, working to pay the bills, doctor appointments, church commitments, and the hundred small things that keep everything on target.
Then one day you started wondering if you missed your window. Are you allowed to come back?
But it's not really about coming back at all. You never really left. You didn't stop being an artist because you were not performing publicly.
On the podcast this week, my guest Molly Norenberg talked about how we often separate our lives into sections. There is the artist part, then there is the part where everyone else needs something from us. We agreed, it's not that cut and dry.
The years away still count. You don't just shut off your artist brain or your creativity during these periods of reduced musical productivity.
If you were raising children, you learned things about patience, irritation, surrender, and love that you could not have learned from a practice room. If you were working a demanding job, you learned what it feels like to be capable and drained at the same time.
Caring for others or trying to get through a hard stretch helped you become the person who's returning to music now.
You may not have had the energy to turn any of those emotions and lessons into songs yet. Even though you lacked the creative spark, the mental bandwidth, or the hours in your weekly schedule to follow an idea long enough to turn it into a verse or chorus, you've clocked the hours toward future creative output.
See, those years were not wasted.
When I was home with young kids and not performing the way I wanted to, I still wrote. Sometimes a song idea came while I was walking my daughter to preschool. I would repeat the phrase in my head on the way home, hoping I could get inside fast enough to write it down before someone needed a snack, a diaper change, or help finding the missing shoe that was somehow under the couch again.
Being an artist is not a job you resign from. It's your identity. And I'm guessing you've noticed that you can't just turn it off, and frankly you don't want to.
So please don't use the years away as evidence against yourself. You may feel rusty. Your voice may need extra care and your confidence may need time to rebuild.
You may need to figure out what performing looks like now instead of trying to recreate the way you did it years ago.
That is normal, and definitely recommended.
Coming back doesn't require you to erase everything that happened while you were away from the stage or pretend the gap didn't exist. You are returning with different instincts, more profound stories, and a clearer sense of what deserves saying yes to.
This week’s podcast conversation with Molly Norenberg goes deeper into this, especially if you are trying to come back to performing after years away. We talk about:
• the shame that can come with stepping away
• why singing for pleasure can be the bridge back to confidence
• how three minutes of singing can start rebuilding the habit
• why taking your dream seriously does not mean turning it into a pressure cooker
If you have been wondering whether it is too late, or whether you are still allowed to call yourself an artist, I think this episode will feel like a warm hug and a kick in the butt at the same time.
Listen on Spotify:
Listen to the full episode here on Apple Podcasts and other apps or watch the video.
Remember, the years away are an essential part of what you have to say now.
Always in your corner,
<3 Bree
PS: If you prefer to read FEM Friday on Substack, you can Subscribe Here
You're reading the Profitable Musician Newsletter, FEM Friday Edition. This Friday newsletter is created for Female Artists & Advocates, and focuses on our mission to amplify quality music by Female Artists & Female-Fronted Bands in all genres and help them build a thriving music career and solid business. If you'd like to unsubscribe from FEM Fridays but still receive our regular Wednesday Profitable Musician Newsletter, click here and we'll note your preference.
